Fast X (2023)

Rating: 6.9

TL;DR - Fast X was hilarious..ly bad.

So many stupid things… the franchise is essentially just unintentional self-parody at this point. But… I had a better time with it than F9 at least… even if that’s only because I was laughing AT the movie. It’s absolutely a garbage movie, but Jason Momoa was so much fun at least!

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Film Info:

Premise: Over many missions and against impossible odds, Dom Toretto and his family have outsmarted and outdriven every foe in their path. Now, they must confront the most lethal opponent they've ever faced. Fueled by revenge, a terrifying threat emerges from the shadows of the past to shatter Dom's world and destroy everything -- and everyone -- he loves.

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Universal

Directed by Louis Leterrier

Screenplay by Dan Mazeau & Justin Lin

Cast: Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, Jason Momoa, Tyrese Gibson, Chris “Ludacris” Bridges, John Cena, Nathalie Emmanuel, Jordana Brewster, Sung Kang, Scott Eastwood, Jason Statham, Charlize Theron, Brie Larson, Alan Ritchson, Daniela Melchior, Rita Moreno, Helen Mirren

Runtime: 2hr 21min

Rating: PG

Action, Adventure, Crime, Mystery, Thriller

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IMDb Rating: 6.3/10

Rotten Tomatoes Score: 54%

RT Audience Score: 85%

RT Critic Average: 5.7/10

RT Audience Average: 4.3/5

Metacritic Score: 55

CinemaScore: B+

Letterboxd: 2.9/5

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Fun Fact: Michelle Rodriguez and Charlize Theron filmed their fight scene without a director.

Also: The word family is said 56 times in this film.

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Review:

written by Tyler Park

I genuinely have no business reviewing Fast X. I’m not a big fan of the Fast and Furious movies, and really only saw this one because I was curious to see how truly ridiculous this one would be after F9 took some of its characters to space IN A CAR. Needless to say, I don’t think very highly of these movies to begin with.

On the positive side… it’s a little better than the last few movies, and a little less crazy and ridiculous. However on a more negative note… it’s an absolutely horrendous garbage movie; it’s a complete mess of a film. But… I don’t regret watching it because I had a completely good time while the movie was on screen. I was dying of laughter for most of the film alongside my friends — the movie was hilarious…ly bad. Alas, we were all laughing AT the movie, not with it. It would have been fine if this movie was intended as a comedy… but the fact it asks us to take it seriously when it’s essentially an unintentional self-parody of the franchise makes it quite problematic. It’s a fast-food movie, and quite forgettable, but I can’t say I wasn’t entertained while watching it.

But you can be entertained while recognizing the movie you are watching is absolutely a piece of crap at the same time. The only reason I gave it this high a rating is because of how good a time it let me have with my friends. I can guarantee if I was to have watched this alone… I would rate it much lower.

I know I am part of the problem here, but I really hate that audiences today are so accepting of movies that really don’t try. This movie is so ridiculous and stupid that it is entertaining, but it has absolutely no story, no characters, and nothing to care about to back up the mindless action we see on screen. Why do we assume you can only have one or the other? Why do we just accept being given one or the other? We can have a good movie with strong writing while also having great, bombastic action! For example, Mission: Impossible - Fallout, or even Captain America: Civil War gave us riveting narratives, wonderful twists and turns that made sense, multi-dimensional, layered characters with beautiful inter-character conflicts and they did all of that while also giving us big bombastic set-pieces, great action, and great fights. So I don’t know why when it comes to this franchise we as film audiences just accept being handed half-assed mediocrity. I expect better. Heck, in the last year we’ve seen better: John Wick 4, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3, Top Gun: Maverick, or even Avatar: The Way of Water. I would love to enjoy Fast X as the filmmakers intended me to, but I can’t when all they offer is mindless, ridiculous action with no semblance of depth, story, or character. They gave me absolutely no reason to care. If they want me to enjoy it as a comedy, fine — then I’d say this was an effective movie. But the fact that they ask us as the audience to take it all seriously… it makes me truly want to laugh at the movie. Because they didn’t do the work to earn my emotion, my attention in that regard. Sure, there were redeeming qualities and I had a good time laughing at it with my friends, but that doesn’t let them off the hook for making a terrible movie.

I mean, when half your movie is shot without a director, and when you eventually hire one, you only give him 3 days to prepare before shooting… I don’t know what else you expect to get besides a mess. This film was probably doomed from the start, and even if Louis Leterrier did try his best to save the film, there is absolutely no way he could have saved it with the circumstances he was put in. Considering those circumstances… maybe this is a decent film. But it shows why movies need a director at the helm — it is very clear that many sequences here were shot without clear direction and vision. They are all over the place, with many different tones and visual languages. It really feels like an instance where there were too many cooks in the kitchen, and that is likely because Leterrier was brought on too late. The film is just all over the place and I can’t say it ever felt cohesive. Plus, as part 1 of a larger story, it falls into all the traps that a part 1 could: it’s all set up, no resolution, it has really dumb twists leading to an unbelievable cliffhanger that I couldn’t take seriously, and most of the plotlines in the movie just felt like filler. It also really tried to copy the Infinity War template, splitting up the crew into groups on different “missions” (I say it in quotations because really only Dom had a plot where he had to do things, the rest of the characters were just running). The story as a whole is nonsensical and is riddled with plot holes and misleading moments that don’t make sense when the twists are revealed. It also has some pretty horrible dialogue… like Star Wars prequel levels of awkwardness. Even the humour didn’t land. At least the action was exciting again, even if it was still quite silly and ridiculous. (The crane scene in Rome had me howling… you’ll know it when you see it).

BUT… Jason Momoa was goddamn fantastic in this movie! He was the highlight for me, and would be one of the only reasons I’d ever rewatch this one! Momoa knows what kind of movie he’s in from the start (seems to be the only cast member who knows), and he just has fun with the role! I loved how he played it, not taking it overly seriously and delivering one of the best and most memorable villains in the franchise because of this. I loved his energy and how bonkers of a performance he gave — despite giving a very silly performance, he commanded the screen with it! If only more of the cast could have fun with it like Momoa did!

I’m finishing writing this review a day after I saw Fast X… and I gotta say… I can barely remember what happened. It’s a very forgettable movie that left no lasting impression on me. For a movie that cost $340 million to make (where’d that money go??), you’d think it would have offered up something so incredible, so memorable. Instead… it’s just 2 and a half hours of mediocrity that is really only fun if you’re with a group of friends. Sure, it might be the best since Furious 7, but that’s not a very high bar to beat. The movie is pretty bad.

Maybe Part 2 can be better… but at this rate, I don’t have high hopes.

And yet, I know I’ll be there with a group of friends laughing at the ridiculousness on screen, just like with this one.

It’s really the only way to get through these movies.

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Trailer: